10 Things You Should Know Before Asking A Guy Out
Just so you know, guys love it when a woman asks them out. But there's a right way to do it.
In case you want to be a little more proactive with your it's-almost-Valentine's Day-lovelife, try following this little how-to guide.
(If you're wondering why you should do this now, you don't want to look desperate seeking a boyfriend on February 13. Plus the longer you know him the better gift you will probably get.)
1. If you want to go on a date with him, ask him out
Don't be a wimp.
2. If you take the initiative to ask him out, have a plan of what you want to do.
It was your idea to ask, so you should actually have an idea of a place to go. Asking him to go out, and then following it with the question, So where do you want to go? or When? is the worst.
3. If you offer the vague, non-committal "Let's go out sometime," and he agrees, you have three more texting encounters to finally make a suggestion.
Asking someone to get together "sometime," but never finding the time to do it, means you are always finding other activities you would rather do than go out with him on that date you suggested.
4. If you ask him and he declines, you can certainly try again (and you should, life is short), but it is his turn to ask you.
Never chase anyone. Sadly, there are people in this world who will keep sending you "What’s up" text messages only because they seek attention more than they seek affection.
5. If you asked him out, he said yes, and you agreed on a day/night of the week, always have a plan set before you go to bed the night before.
Even if it is a quick message of "I get off at work around ____, I will text you then," that is enough to let him know you remembered, and you respect the fact that he can't wait around for you all day.
6. If he asks you out and you want to meet, but you already have plans for the time he suggests, offer another time. Don't just turn him down.
Suggest something immediately, during that conversation. "I am busy on Friday. How about Saturday?"
7. Stop sending countless texts and "smiles" and "woofs" on hookup sites to young guys, complimenting them simply for being young and beautiful.
Sending a 21-year-old a 'smile' on Adam4Adam or a 'woof' on Scruff is nothing more than a fleeting thought, an effortless gesture; but those messages add up in their inboxes, and eventually those lovely young men think they somehow deserve the attention provided by the lists of men who apparently think they are special. Save your compliments for the people, young or old, who you actually know and like. Compliments should be part of an actual conversation
8. An introductory phone conversation can tell you a lot about him, in just minutes.
Cell phone technology has ruined the experience of talking on the phone, with garbled voices and never finding a convenient moment for both persons to talk. Endless texting, with the "What's up and "What do you like to do for fun?" and "What are you into?" questions, is no way to get to know a person.
9. Sending a text message in front of someone else is the same as having a secret conversation.
Texting has become a social necessity, but your date has no idea if you are sending a message of "This guy is so ugly and boring" and you are planning an escape. Or perhaps he thinks you just got a message on Grindr, and you're texting back that you are on a date but can meet up for sex later.
10. Whoever asked to go on the date, pays for the date.
If you ask him to an expensive restaurant for dinner, don’t expect him to pay for his half. He may not be able to afford it.