I guess you could say his plan fell through. This is "Crappy News" for Thursday, August 2nd, 2018.

West Bend, WI- A man lost his hands and legs after getting licked by a dog.

48-year-old Greg Manteufel was originally treated for the flu at a hospital back in June.

Thinkstock

But when his condition worsened tests revealed that Manteufel was suffering from septic shock brought on from a severe blood infection.

The cause? The capnocytophaga canimorsus bacteria, which is found in nearly 75% of all dogs. The bacteria is harmless to them, but very dangerous to humans. It's likely Manteufel got sick from his own dog licking him.

His hands and legs had to be amputated. Doctors say this case is an unfortunate fluke. More than 99% of dog owners will never have this issue. [FOX 6 Milwaukee / Total News Wire]

Chattisgarh, India- A man almost fell to his death trying to take a selfie.

Thinkstock

The victim was attempting to take a photo of himself at the edge of a waterfall when he slipped on the wet stone, plunging down onto the rocks below, nearly landing onto another man at the bottom of the falls.

A witness caught video of the victim sliding 50 feet down the rock formations and hurtling towards the ground.

Miraculously, the man survived with only a broken pelvis. Hey...it's better than dying. [Meaww.com]

Waterloo- A robbery suspect had a "rocky" alibi.

Photo By: Elwin Huffman - Townsquare Media

Officers were notified about an alarm at the Three Star Mart on Jefferson Street last week. Police came to the store but didn't notice anything suspicious.

Employees said that a man had fallen through the store's ceiling tiles and left before police arrived.

Security video showed the burglar trying to pick the lock at the front door before climbing up to the roof and falling.

This weekend an officer spotted a man who resembled the suspect carrying a backpack with a crowbar and syringes. 23-year-old Michael Lewis allegedly told officers that he was on the roof of the convenience store looking for rocks.

SHOCKINGLY...the cops didn't believe him...and he was arrested for charges including third-degree burglary and possession of drug paraphernalia. [The Courier]

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