I don't know if I'm even allowed to say the words "S---r" and "B--l", but I'm not getting sued. You are probably intending on being at some social gathering Sunday, and as someone who knows a great deal about football as well as alienating people, here's some tips for football fans and non-football fans alike.


Bring something. To drink. If you know the host(s) you probably know what they like to drink. Even if you just brought stuff for you to drink, it's less money they have to worry about spending.

If you do bring food, make sure it's something for everyone, not just you. Hosts usually go to a lot of trouble to not only make food, but impress people with their food. Showing up with a bag from some fast-food place, or a box of pizza, is basically saying you don't want to eat their food. That is not only an insult, but also stupid. Free food not good enough for you? Friendships end over stuff like that.

Social gatherings around football are usually less intense, so go over that guest list again. Unless this is a specific "We're Cheering For _________" party, you're going to be blending people who seriously may not care who wins the game with people who will live and die on every play. If you love unintentional comedy, love posting awkward stuff on social media, and/or don't care if you see these people again, then go for it.

STFU during the commercials. There will be people there who don't want to watch the game. They will be there because of another person, they will be there for free food, they will be there to be seen, and/or they will be there for the commercials.

If you gamble don't get busted for excessive celebration. This would fall under general rudeness.

If you are asked who you want to win, and you are neither a Denver or Carolina fan.......... It's okay to temporarily adopt a team if it's for a good reason. If you're response is "I don't care who wins I just want to see a good game" then you basically forfeit your right to show any emotion toward what happens in the game.

Don't make fun of anyone who clearly shows their lack of football knowledge. There are many people who only watch one football game a year. They do it because it's an event, and it's supposed to be a fun social gathering anyway. So just let it slide. Or don't let it slide, and then the next time you show your ignorance about a topic you know little to nothing about don't get butthurt when people return the favor.