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CRAPPY NEWS – 3/20/17

Would you do THIS if your food order was incorrect? I’m guessing not. Here are today’s top stories…

Kent, England- Police waited VERY patiently for evidence in a robbery case to turn up.

Jupiterimages
Jupiterimages

52-year-old Clifford Airey stole a gold chain back in January. He was still in possession of it when he broke into a different home. Police caught him, so he SWALLOWED the necklace to avoid being linked to the other crime.

While locked up, cops played a very smelly version of the waiting game. When Airey had to go #2…he PASSED the chain. Police then recovered the necklace from his STOOL. That–ahem–evidence helped convict him, and Airey was sentenced to 8 years in jail for the robberies. [Metro]

That really IS crappy news…

Phoenix, AZ- A man’s proposal turned into a life-threatening ordeal.

Thinkstock
Thinkstock

George Begalla and his girlfriend, Katie Woodford, were on vacation last week and hiked to the top of Camelback Mountain.

He popped the question and she accepted…but then started feeling very ill. Katie began hyperventilating and complaining of muscle cramps. Turns out, she was overheated and dehydrated from the hike and had to be airlifted to the hospital.

Shortly after that, medics noticed that George’s pulse was really high…so he ALSO got a helicopter ride to the hospital. [AZFamily.com]

Further proof that exercise is a COMPLETE waste of time.

Nashville, TN- Three teens shot up a convenience store…over a pizza.

Thinkstock
Thinkstock

18-year-old Djuan Bowers and two friends ordered a pizza Thursday night. As they left, they realized that their order was wrong, so they OPENED FIRE on the store before driving away. Nobody was hurt, but an undercover cop happened to be working nearby and followed the suspects’ vehicle.

Officers found several handguns inside the car, which had been stolen. All three suspects were charged with 12 counts of weapons possession, vehicle theft, and aggravated assault. Two of the teens already faced charges of robbing a man at gunpoint last month. [The Tennessean]

I have three words they should add to their vocabulary: SEND IT BACK.

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