CRAPPY NEWS – 4/26/17
Happy Hump Day! Here are today's headlines: A thief limbers up, a man doesn't pay up, and a grandma lawyers up...
Philadelphia, PA- Police are searching for a man who robbed a Dunkin' Donuts on Saturday.
The suspect did a very good job of disguising himself--he was dressed in all black and wore a ski mask and gloves. He entered the store, brandished a gun, and wound up with about $330 before taking off. What's strange is what happened BEFORE the robbery.
So, if you know anyone who likes to commit armed robbery and perform calisthenics, please notify the authorities ASAP...
Ocala, FL- A man has been arrested after trying to pay strippers using a sample credit card.
38-year-old Kevin Boudreau ran up a tab of $104 for “drinks and services” at a gentlemen's club early Sunday morning.
When it came time to pay Boudreau gave the manager a credit card with NO NAME on it. So...either Boudreau was carrying a bogus card or one of the sample cards you get in the mail. Whatever the case may be, he was jailed on fraud charges. [Villages News]
Words of wisdom: Strippers get very mad when you mess with their money. Maybe next time, he'll try writing a bunch of IOUs...
Homewood, AL- A woman claims to have choked on a condom...while at IHOP?
Demetria Hannah brought her family to the restaurant back in February and alleges that she found a condom in her order of French toast.
Her attorneys say Hannah felt the love glove get lodged in her throat while eating, and her young grandson had to help her remove it.
She's suing for negligence and emotional distress.
Yeah...I could see a hair accidentally falling into someone's food. But a condom?! Maybe I'm giving the IHOP short order cooks too much credit, but I think they'd be a BIT more observant...and if you can't tell the difference between LATEX and SOGGY BREAD you probably have bigger issues. And an eating problem.