CRAPPY NEWS – 7/3/17
A driver trusts his technology a little too much, an incontinent man gets robbed, and a druggie eats his stash in front of cops...
West Yarmouth, MA- A man drove into a lake--because his GPS told him to.
Daniel Alley was following his GPS to a friend's house early Friday morning. Alley said his GPS instructed him to turn onto Lake Road (probably should've been a clue) and continue straight. But since it was dark, he couldn't tell that he was about to drive directly into the water.
When cops arrived, they found Alley's vehicle about 100 feet off shore and almost totally submerged. Rescue crews removed the car from the lake. That's when police realized that Alley had a revoked driver's license, so he received a ticket. [Fox 25]
It's not a good day when you drive your car into a lake...and it's only the second-worst thing that happened to you...
San Francisco, CA- A man was the victim of a very...irregular...crime.
The 64-year-old man was waiting for a train on Thursday when he began arguing with two women. One of the suspects attacked him with pepper spray and her accomplice stole the man's bag, which happened to be full of laxatives.
The women left on foot and police are still looking for them. Perhaps they should try a bathroom?? [SFGate.com]
Not only is this guy traumatized, now he's traumatized AND constipated.
Ft. Pierce, FL- A man tried to hide his weed from police...by eating it.
33-year-old Blake Smith was stopped for riding his bike at night without headlights.
Cops noticed Smith pull something from his pocket. He then put his hand to his mouth and then began chewing rapidly. Smith then "retrieved a large soft drink from the front basket of his bicycle and took several large gulps."
Smith finally stuck his tongue out after the deputy asked, and the investigator saw suspected pot on his tongue. Smith maintained he was simply munching on Combos and Skittles. Officers stated that Smith was not coherent and had difficulty answering questions; he also declined to give a urine sample.
Smith was arrested for DUI. [TCPalm]
He must've been pretty high if he thought a cop wouldn't know what pot looks like...