Huh? What? Why? How? Ouch. This is 'Crappy News' for Wednesday, September 20th.


Tallahassee, FL- A guy was arrested after calling for an ambulance--while he was already at the hospital.

45-year-old Vanderick Williams was in the emergency room earlier this month. Hospital staff reported that Williams was being argumentative and disrupting other patients. Apparently, he'd gotten tired of he called 911 asking for ambulance to drop him off at a different hospital.

Williams has been charged with misuse of 911. [Tallahassee Democrat]

Superior, MN- A man was arrested...for drawing in wet cement.


23-year-old Jordan Judson wrote his name in some freshly poured concrete last month...oh, and he also drew a penis because WHAT ELSE WOULD YOU DRAW?

A group of construction workers saw him and called police.

The city decided to re-do the sidewalk, which cost about $13,000. Judson was arrested and charged with felony property damage. The maximum punishment is a $10,000 fine and three-and-a-half YEARS in prison. [Duluth News Tribune]

Why is all the fun stuff we did as kids illegal now?!

Worms, Germany- This guy took the term "pumping iron" a BIT too far.


The man was at a gym last week when he grabbed one of those weight plates you put on a barbell...and tried to pleasure himself with it. And...of course...his penis GOT STUCK.

Crews had to use angle grinders, a saw, and a hydraulic device to remove the weight. After THREE HOURS they were finally able to get the man's junk free. He's expected to make a full recovery, but I'm guessing his pride is hurt forever. [Daily Mail]

Here's more proof that if ANY item in the world has a hole in it, some dude somewhere will try to have sex with it.

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