This is "Crappy News" for Tuesday, November 13th, 2018.

Randers, Denmark- A zoo is hoping for the return of three rare turtles.

Thinkstock

Officials at the Randers Tropical Zoo said three Burmese Star turtles were taken from their exhibit during visiting hours on Sunday.

Employees say the fences in the exhibit are too high for the turtles to have escaped on their own (plus...how would you NOT catch them? They're turtles).

The zoo says it was attempting to breed the turtles and will not press charges against the thieves if they return the animals unharmed. [UPI]

Maybe they should check their security cameras for giant rats. You never know.

Palm Harbor, FL- A perp tried to pull a prank straight out of The Simpsons.

Pinellas County Jail

Police found a guy lingering near a park after hours and warned him that he was trespassing.

When the cop asked him his name, he said . . . "Ben Dover." He then gave the cop the middle finger and tried to run away.

Shockingly, Ben Dover wasn't the dude's real name.

22-year-old Andrew Leighton was charged with two misdemeanors: obstruction by a disguised person and resisting an officer. [The Smoking Gun]

Seymour Butts was unavailable for comment.

Sidney, IA- A minor traffic stop in turned into a major drug bust.

Getty Images

Fremont County officers pulled over an RV for multiple moving violations early Friday morning.

A K9 unit detected the smell of drugs.Police searched the vehicle and found 300 lbs. of "high grade" marijuana worth more than $2.8 million.

65-year-old Richard Jordan, 45-year-old Patrick Hawes, and 44-year-old Elwood Perry, Jr., were each charged with felony possession of a controlled substance with intent to deliver more than 100 kilograms. [KWQC-TV]

Think about all of those poor plants that will go unsmoked. And all of that cereal that will go uneaten.

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