Usually, free food is a great idea. Here's "Crappy News" for Wednesday, December 5th, 2018.

Philadelphia, PA- A disgruntled customer tried to burn down a store.

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An unidentified woman came in last month and attempted to buy beer, but didn't have any money.

The owner asked her to leave before the woman took out a can of hairspray from her pocketbook and ignited it with a lighter. Video from inside the store shows her burning items on the front counter.

The owner had to run from the counter to avoid being burned. Nobody was injured and the fire didn't spread. Authorities released the surveillance video and are trying to locate the suspect. [NBC Philadelphia]

I'm actually kind of impressed by her ingenuity.

Sandwich, IL- Two kids were "inspired" by a holiday classic.

Getty Images/iStockphoto

11-year-old Spencer Cline was sledding with a friend last Tuesday night. Afterwards the boys came across a pole along a fence and decided to recreate a scene from A Christmas Story.

Spencer was not triple-dog-dared, but he put his tongue on the pole, and--of course--it got stuck. He said, "I was trying to get it off, but I wasn’t pulling. I was being gentle and freaking out. Some of my taste buds came off onto the pole."

Spencer was able to pull his tongue off by the time emergency crews arrived. He estimated he was stuck for about seven minutes. [Aurora Beacon-News]

St. Petersburg, FL- This guy found out that free food isn't always a selling point.

Thinkstock

57-year-old Frank Caponi approached a prostitute on Saturday, and he had an--interesting--proposition.

Instead of money, Caponi offered her a hamburger in exchange for oral sex.

It's unclear if he already had the hamburger or if he was going to buy it after their encounter. Either way, the prostitute turned out to be an undercover police officer.

Caponi was arrested for misdemeanor solicitation. [The Smoking Gun]

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