That amount of ramen should last until about 2061. This is "Crappy News" for Monday, August 20th, 2018.

Plymouth, MA- This guy is probably hoping for a mulligan.

A man was arrested after allegedly biting off another golfer's finger.

The incident happened Friday, when two foursomes sere on the 18th hold of a local golf course. 46-year-old Derek Harkins got into a fight with another man on the course. A witness called 911 after noticing the victim had his finger bitten off to his knuckle.

Doctors were unable to reattach the finger. Harkins has been charged with assault and battery, mayhem and disturbing the peace. It's unclear if alcohol played a role in the brawl. [WCVB-TV]

I thought golf was a classy, gentlemanly game?

Suffolk, VA- This is a total lack of R-E-S-P-E-C-T.

Andrew H. Walker/Getty Images

Music legend Aretha Franklin passed away on Thursday. Less than an hour after her death was made public, two men at a barbershop got into an argument about whether Halle Berry should play her in a movie. Let's just say things got pretty intense.

Police say 44-year-old Michael Jermell Hatton grabbed his gun, shooting the other man at least once outside the shop. The victim, 47-year-old Tony Lundy, is in critical condition. Hatton was treated for his injuries and then arrested.

It's unclear who did the shooting--the "yes, Halle Berry should play her in a movie" guy or the "no, Halle Berry shouldn't play her in a movie" guy. [CBS 3 - Norfolk]

For what it's worth Halle Berry didn't think she was right for the part, either.

Fayette County, GA- Police are investigating after thieves managed to steal $98,000 worth of RAMEN NOODLES.

iamumbrellastudio

The noodles were stolen from a 53-foot trailer outside of a service station last week. Take a second and think about JUST how many packs of ramen that is. They cost approximately 30 cents each...which equates to about 327,000 packages.

Two questions. One--who has that much storage space? Two--is there some kind of underground, dark web, black market ramen trade I don't know about?

Cops are still looking for the suspects. [Atlanta Journal-Constitution]

Police have narrowed the search to every college student living in dorms within a 100-mile radius.

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