Three things are certain: Death, taxes, and teenage boys doing REALLY stupid stuff to get girls to like them. This is 'Crappy News' for Tuesday, September 26th.

Lexington, MS- Four inmates broke out of jail...just so they could break back in.


Levontaye Ellington, Travis Baker, Maurice Robertson and Jacquiez Williams escaped their cell last Tuesday. The four then jumped the fence of the jail and walked less than a mile to a Dollar General. The suspects then stole cigarettes, lighters and phones...with the intent of selling them to other inmates.

Ellington, Baker, Robertson and Willams sneaked BACK into jail unnoticed by prison staff (!) but store surveillance cameras helped identify them. All four have been charged with commercial burglary, and officers are working to increase security. [MS News Now]

I'm guessing those guards PROBABLY don't work there anymore...

Bloomington, IN- A college freshman spent three days trapped in a cave.

19-year-old Lukas Cavar went on a trip with the caving club at Indiana University last week.


Cavar somehow got separated from the group during the trek, and when he reached the entrance to exit the cave, he realized the gate was padlocked.

Cavar had no cell signal, so he spent hours screaming for help. He wound up being stranded for 58 hours. Cavar's parents couldn't get a hold of him so they filed a missing persons report. When word got back to the caving club, they went back and rescued him last Tuesday.

Cavar survived by licking water from the cave walls, and said he doesn’t plan to go spelunking again any time soon. [Fox 59]

This just proves that you're NEVER too old for the "buddy" system. It's always a good idea.

Marion County, FL- A teen impersonated a impress his girlfriend.


18-year-old Isael Lima broke into his uncle's home, stole his police uniform AND and his patrol car. He took it for a drive, picked up some friends, and even responded to call to break up a fight at a convenience store.

All to look like a badass in front of his girlfriend.

Lima got busted when his uncle came back home and reported the stuff had been stolen. Lima was arrested on EIGHT different charges, including grand theft, armed burglary, and impersonating a law enforcement officer. []

I'm sure his girlfriend thinks he's, like, so cool.

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