This granny got her groove back. This is "Crappy News" for Monday, July 30th.

Lake Delton, WI- A guy committed identity theft...just to watch his favorite team.

Kevin C. Cox/Getty Images

51-year-old Kevin Cayton was vacationing in Lake Delton back in December. He's also a huge fan of the Arizona Wildcats basketball team and didn't want to miss a game while he was on his trip. So...he decided to get creative.

Cayton made 11 different phone calls to the cable provider of Buffalo Phil's in Lake Delton, pretending to be an employee, asking to upgrade the restaurant's TV package to include the Pac-12 Network. BUT ... he never called to cancel the subscription ... and the manager investigated after receiving a huge cable bill.

Prosecutors charged Cayton with felony identity theft for financial gain and unauthorized use of an entity’s identifying information. Each count carries a max sentence of SIX YEARS in jail. A big price to pay to avoid streaming the game on your damn laptop.[Baraboo News]

I love my teams, too. But probably not enough to justify going to prison.

Hyannis, MA- A woman got arrested for DUI...and so did the tow truck driver who came to pick up her car.

Thinkstock

51-year-old Patricia O'Donnell was busted for drunken driving Saturday night, and police called a towing company to take her car. 25-year-old Brandon Fenton was sent to get O'Donnell's vehicle...but didn't quite get the job done.

A reporter witnessed the tow truck swerving off to the side of the road and nearly hitting a pole. The man recorded the truck on his dash cam and uploaded it to YouTube. O'Donnell & Fenton were each charged with operating under the influence. [Cape Cod Times]

Does that mean a different tow truck had to tow THAT tow truck?

Birmingham, England- This is definitely one of the strangest love triangles EVER.

Massonstock

A 24-year-old woman suspected that her husband may be cheating. The couple had only been married about a year, but she noticed he was being distant and staying late at work, so she hired a private investigator to look into him.

Detectives found that her husband had registered with multiple dating websites offering trysts with older women. How much older? Investigators tracked him a hotel and caught the 26-year-old in the act...with a 72-year-old grandmother of four.

Making things worse--if that's even possible--the detectives showed video of the affair to the wife. [Birmingham Mail]

46 years older? No amount of therapy is going to wash that image away. Good for Granny, I guess...

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