Seriously? How could you NOT find this dude? This is 'Crappy News' for Wednesday, January 10th.

Middletown, OH- Police believe a bank robber used the stolen money to buy an engagement ring.

Diamond Engagement Ring
Thinkstock
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36-year-old Justin Pedersen has been accused of robbing a Fifth Third Bank last month. Nearly $9,000 was stolen from the bank, and records show that Pedersen purchased a $4,500 diamond ring less than an hour after the robbery.

Pedersen became a suspect after a man wearing an identical hat committed a separate robbery a week later. Pedersen has denied any involvement in the crimes, but told police that security camera images of the robber do look like him. [Yahoo!]

Hey, if it walks like a duck...

Boonton, NJ- A snowplow driver was busted for being drunk while on the job.

Snow plow on the road
Purestock
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36-year-old Roger Attieh sideswiped a vehicle while removing snow late Monday afternoon. He got out of his DOT truck to look at the damage, then got back inside the truck and tried to drive away. Attieh then struck a second vehicle while leaving the scene.

Cops performed several field sobriety tests before giving Attieh a breathalyzer. His blood alcohol content was more than four times the legal limit...but NINE times the legal limit for a commercial driver. So...what? 0.36? .37?

No one was injured and Attieh was charged with DWI, DWI in a commercial motor vehicle and reckless driving. This is actually his fourth arrest for drunken driving, the last one coming on December 14th. [NorthJersey.com]

Houston, TX- Cops are searching for a career criminal with a very--distinguishing--feature.

Robert Wooten (Photo: Houston Police Dept.)
Robert Wooten (Photo: Houston Police Dept.)
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40-year-old Robert Wooten is currently a fugitive wanted for a series of armed robberies.

It shouldn't be too difficult to track him down...because Wooten has Houston's area code, 713, tattooed across his throat--and his social security number tattooed on his forehead.

Wooten has several prior convictions and prison terms in his criminal history. Police are asking anyone with knowledge of his whereabouts to come forward. Seriously...how hard could it be to find him? [The Smoking Gun]

I don't think any forehead tattoo is a good idea, but this one seems especially bad. Let's hope nobody tries to steal THAT guy's identity.

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